Skirt fail! (Toilet fail)

I’m a big girl. Haven’t soiled myself in ages. I know every way to sit on the loo without getting anything in the way, including long and billowing dresses and stupidly long scarfs. Until today. 

I found a skirt I han forgotten I owned, and put it on, happy as a clam. I’m not sure how it happened, but the skirt was of the wider description and knee length, if that has anything to do with anything. 

Anyway, I sat on the bog, did my business, and when I went in to wipe, I saw the black curtain of horror. I don’t know how I got it out off the toilet and off me without getting as much as a drop on myself, the toilet or the floor. Quite impressed by self, actually. I don’t think I weed on it, but rather dipped it in the water. Disgusting no matter what. 

Oh well. Made for a little story of my lack of control, at least. And I’ve learned my lesson. Hopefully. 


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